The year of the horse is almost here! Following the new moon at the end of this month, the Chinese New Year will beckon in the year of the Wood Horse (or Green Horse). I, for one, am happy to bid adieu to the Snake, and the slinky, slithery secrecy and mutable mysteries that came with it.
I was born during the year of the horse, so I was excited to start reading what I had hoped would be the positive predictions of what to come. Of course, with every good thing, there comes a warning of what could go wrong. For example, even something as seemingly great as coming into a large sum of money could result in the jealousy of others, or an impulse to spend it all right away. So, for all my equine intuition (which is enabled even more so by my additional helper spirits, the spider, for one) I still need to be PATIENT, to implement the imperative WAITING when it’s not safe to act on my intuitive impulses. To know when it’s safe to go emo with my Horse self, in the safe space of supportive others, and to know when it’s best to hold my tongue, and stay quiet until the optimal moment. Sigh. Fine. More opportunities for growth! Thanks universe! For reals.
I had a dream recently which was not about horses, but rather, another of the helper spirits, the bear, for which my son is named, Mato. In the dream, Mato and I wandered calmly through a snow-encrusted, magical, sunlit forest. Every surface was blanketed in the twinkling white light, the sun’s diamond rays warmed our faces as the steam blew from our noses. Soon, we heard the crusty crunching of other feet. As we looked into the trees, three little bears came bounding out towards us, playing with each other and rolling around. Mato wanted to play with the bears, and he ran towards them. I got caught up in the joy of watching my fourth little bear with his furry brothers.
But then a sense of dread came over me as I realized that their mother couldn’t be far behind, and with her would come the mounting danger of her protective instincts. Not wanting to make any noise, I starting walking towards Mato and the bears, when I heard a grunt behind me. I turned around to face her, and she was standing up like a human, inquisitive, but ready. As I looked back at Mato and the cubs, they were all rolling down the hill together. However, perhaps let by his own intuition, my Mato rolled away from them. The mama bear and I looked at each other, and each took off after our own.
I had many thoughts when I woke from the dream. One was that I miss being outside as much as I used to be, when I wasn’t living in the city. The sensory experience of the snow and trees was so palpable, real. Perhaps an astral projection?
Another realization was that we have to hold those small moments of joy, however short they are, in our hearts, so that when the difficult realities of our lives set in, we have something to revisit in our minds to lift our spirits to get us through to the next moment of joy. We have to hold space, patiently.
When I was 13, I took part in the Catholic Confirmation ceremony, as I was attending Catholic school. I didn’t feel committed to the specificity of the religious notions behind the ritual. But I did like the idea of choosing my own name for myself, which is part of the ceremony. Generally, young adults are encouraged to identify a saint with whom they identify, or whose virtues they want to strive towards, and select that name for their own middle name. I really couldn’t find one that felt right to me. Always being somehow different, I asked if, instead, I could choose one of the seven virtues: Chastity, Temperance, Charity, Diligence, Patience, Kindness, and Humility. Granting permission to do so (and starting a trend of sorts, that year) I chose the virtue- Patience. Somehow, I knew that no matter how old I got, or what path of spirituality I followed, I would need to continually be reminded to strive for Patience. To do so is to comply with a trinity of on-going lessons: 1) the ability to be patient with others, accepting them for who they are in the present, 2) the ability to be patient with situations, accepting what is beyond our control and 3) the ability to be patient with one’s self, granting ourselves the gifts of non-judgment and acceptance, the same as we award others. So yes, I’m not kidding when I say Patience is my middle name.
These are my lessons for the year of the horse, for 2014:
Be outside more, run free…
Trust your intuition, but balance your impulsiveness with prudence…
Hold each moment of joy, and be patient with others, yourself, and the universe, in between those moments… another one will be right around the bend.
Please visit newly published and updated pages on this site: Matrimony, Continuing Education, Testimonials and For Sale on Etsy and blurb,etc. where you will find links to cool things I’m up to… such as: